The Team

Due to the extraordinary levels of danger involved in the Plymouth - Dakar, we have assembled a team of crack recruits:

Drivers

Benja "Dr Otter" Hedley

Currently holds the world cider gurgling record and has spent considerable periods of his life impersonating fish.

He is a big fan of origami, and both the north and south poles. In fact polish people in general.

He is especially qualified for the journey owing to a fascination with sand, and the worlds largest bucket and spade collection.

He also has a black-belt in camp 3D pointing.

Denis "Monkey-Lover" Meehan

It's a little-known fact that Denis is actually descended from the third Earl of Gringoshire. He grew up in the jungle and after spending the first 8 years of his life in a tree, is extremely comfortable with chimpanzees. He also claims to have invented the spoon.

After 15 years of intense toilet training, he is now safe to spend long periods of time in a vehicle, and is without doubt the tallest person in the car.

Due to a nasty tortoise-related accident whilst training for the Plymouth-Dakar, Denis has had to have his ears surgically replaced with little flowers....

Team Managers

Hatty "6 foot blonde" Kidner

In her spare time Hatty practices levitation and gerbil husbandry. She enjoys quiet nights in and loud nights out.

Her favourite colour is mauve and her favourite word is baboon. Like all six-foot blondes she is often mistaken for Arnold Schwarzenegger in a wig.

Hats is responsible for organising Team Badger Racing, and keeping the drivers under control.

Vanessa "Bad Girl" Williams

Thrown out "Our Lady of the Sacred Hedgehog" convent for violence at the age of 9, Van grew up fast on the hard streets of Surrey. By the age of 13 she was already a trainee pilot for Easyjet, by 14 had got a place at Harvard to lecture in the fine arts.

She is currently the only person in the UK to hold a soft-toy swallowing licence.

Caroline "Evil Eyes" Brakewell

Caroline was orginally born an eskimo. However at the age of three it was discovered she had an allergy to snow, and was adopted by a group of druids in Hertfordshire.

Her formative years consisted of ritual sacrifice and eating leeks. Or ritual sacrifice of leeks.

She is considered extremely dangerous and should not be approached under any cicumstances without a trained handler nearby.